A year after..

It’s almost been a year since my dad left.

So many things have changed and happened in a year. To my family, my circumstances, and myself.

I can’t say that I’m over the sorrow yet, but I can say that I’m not mourning anymore.

I still miss him so much and I’m longing for his presence, now, here, with us.

I miss his joke, I miss his laugh, I miss his hug, I miss his wisdom, I miss his genius thoughts, I miss his kind eyes.

He was a great dad, an all-in-one dad.

He’s my walking encyclopedia, my doctor, my healer, my tutor, my friend, and now he’s my saint.

I couldn’t forgive myself for not being a really good daughter. I hadn’t made him proud of me enough. And I hadn’t do good things to him, I didn’t even had time to serve and nurse him when he was sick. I wasn’t there. Yes, I wasn’t there when he left. It might be the biggest regret in my life. And it became a wound that cannot be cured in my heart.

A year after he left..

I’m still trying to cover the wound and wipe the tears.

I survived, I’m still running my life.

I live his dreams in my own dreams.

I know it’s not the best but I will keep on trying.

After he left..

I know that he’s not going anywhere.

He stays here.

He stays in my heart.

The Island of Art, Food, and Pleasure

I haven’t post anything about Bali because I was literally had no time for blogging while I was there. Me and my classmate, Jessy Bongsu, worked at PT. Desain9 (read: Desain Sembilan) in Kerobokan, Bali. The boss is a famous Japanese interior designer Nobuyuki Narabayashi, former designer at Super Potato, Japan. He had been living in Bali for over 10 years so he can speak Indonesian fluently. Desain9 is a small interior design company with huge astonishing projects, such as The Junction, Casa del Mango, Indi-vie, and so on. Formally, I worked from 10 to 6, but in reality, the clock is ticking much longer than it should be. But no matter how long we stayed at the office, I’ve never got bored, because the atmosphere is really fun and warm. I feel like we were all family from different parents. I learned many things from this small community, from the design things to lifestyle, how to have a (my boss’ version of) balance life. We spent lots of time together, even when we were not in working time. We went karaokeing, baseball, futsal (every Friday), bowling, etc. In my last week in Bali, we went to Ubud, to stay in Jungle Villa for one night. It’s a beautiful private villa, surrounded by a real tropical jungle, with a modern ethnic interior and marvelous landscape. I was really lucky to have such oportunity to experience all those things. I really Bali, and the people, and I promise I’ll come back to Bali, very soon.

Lesson learned: We should have a balance life, and we cannot be a lazy person. We have to sketch (for designers only), we have to eat, we have to drink, we have to play, and we have to do it in equal quantities.

and here's some photos from Bali...

The whole crew..

left-right: Fabian, Kris, Ishikawa San, me, Jessy, Emo, Nara San, Mbak Mila, Ai Ai, Mas Andi. 

We were celebrating Ai Ai and Mbak Mila's birthday, we ate at Laota, and had a big party at Inul Vista. We had a big fun, and everyone was going wild and crazy!

Nasi Bali @ Warung Bali Pasar Taman Sari, Kerobokan.. My favorite local food so far..

Me, in the Junction Workshop, scratching the white-washed timber wood with a piece of glass.. I went here, most in the middle of the day, and my skin became darker and darker day by day.. (see my arm?)

Feasting at Echo Beach, Canggu. Grilled seafood, steak, salad, and many more.. 

Posing at Monkey Forest Ubud

Little evil who stole ice cream from Jessy..

The stairs to Jungle Villa

I also meet my friends, Ugez and Saras, at Kuta Square when they had a school trip to Bali

Playing at Batu Belig Beach, not so far from our office

Sea Turtle Race was the only race I saw at the Independence Day in the entire 
Kerobokan - Kuta area. 

Having lunch at Teras Padi, Tegalalang, near Ubud, with Mbak Mila, Nara San, and Fabian.

And here's the beautiful view..

The not-finished-yet The Junction at night..

Bali Sampling.. The jars containing different spices, traditional foods, etc, It's really satisfying to finally see it, arranged neatly, on the kitchen front of The Junction, after a very long process,and meetings, and trips, and frustrations..

Delicious Shawarma Belgian Sandwich at The Junction

Me and Jessy, in our last hours in Bali... See you later, Bali!!

Apprentice Work in Bali

I'm in 6th semester now and going on 7th and I have to rearrange my plan.

I've planned to graduate in my 4th year, and it means next year. I'm very close to that!

I never thought it will come very soon, I have to get ready.

That's why I've decided to spend my mid-year holiday to work as apprentice in my uncle's Japanese friend's office in Bali.

Why Bali? Because I want to experience a different atmosphere, and increase my standard. 

My mom will come with me in my first week there, but for the rest 1,5 month, I'll be all alone.

Alone in Bali? It scares me a bit. But I have to do that! I have to fight against my fear. I know I can do that. 

I've booked a ticket for June 30th and will start to work July 1st.

I'm so nervous and excited at the same time. 

Oh, if anyone who read this have a plan to go to Bali this holiday, please contact me.

It must be fun to meet a friend in Bali. 

And I think next semester will be an exciting semester for me since I planned to do a lot of new activities, and maybe job. 

Ganbate! 

Foldable Box Chair by Clemency

Adapted from the shape and function of cardboard box, 

this chair is made foldable and also can be used as a storage. 

This is the replica (1:5) of the foldable box chair.

I made this to complete the Desain Mebel IV assignment

Anyone interested to help me make it in 1:1 ? =P

Thank God I'm alive!

Hi.. this is my latest update. I just had a car accident last Tuesday at Tol Cipularang km 87. I was a half way to Bandung in my friend’s car when a bus hit the car. Then the car climbed the road’s median before it turned 180° and stopped at the left path of the road. I was a lil’ bit shocked and I couldn’t feel any pain in my body at the first time. Luckily the road was empty at that time. If it wasn’t, maybe I won’t write this blog anymore. After my friend moved the car to the road side, we waited outside, under the rain, waited for help, and tried to call the insurance company

A few minutes later the help came. Well, I experienced some new things from that incident. First, it was the first time I sit at the police’s car. Second, it was the first time I took a U turn at the highway. Hmm.. okay, that was horrible, not something to brag about. We waited long enough at the police station for some administration stuffs. We’ve been fetched by my friend’s father and brother and I got back to the apartment around 10 pm. I felt so exhausted and dirty. The airbag pain in my neck and my left hand hurt very much. And my left back hurt too, I could’t turn my head to the left, but after some medication massage, I feel so much better. Until now, my body’s still exhausted. I skipped classes. I only laid on the sofa and watched the tv. I couldn’t even forced my brain to think. What a useless retreat. One thing for sure, I thank God that both of us survived the accident and still alive, without any serious injury. Praise the Lord!

And today, I forced myself to go to the campus because I had a hypnotherapy appointment with my lecturer at 3 pm. It’s not like the hypnotic things we usually see at the tv. A hypnotherapist helps us to communicate with the higher us. The deeper us. Our spirit. Or whatever it may called. I had so much questions in my mind, like who I really am. What’s the purpose of my life. And some other stuffs I was curious about. The session was very emotional that I cried hard enough to realized that I have so much problems deep down inside. I can’t wait till my next appointment next week. I’ve been so sensitive, lonely, and pathetic lately, so I wish this therapy will help me being happy again.

Holga in Bali

It's been a long time since my last post.

I've been so lazy to type a word. But I have to fight the laziness so I put a little effort to type a posting again. 

Have I told you that I own a Holga?

A plastic lens camera. One of lomography cameras. 

I've been abandoned it since I brought it to Bali last year because some battery problem.

But I attended a Lomography exhibition at Grand Indonesia at Friday 

and it brought my passion of lomography back. 

I bought a positive and a negative 120mm film and I can't wait to use it soon. 

Here's some 35mm photos from my last trip to Bali.

But I'm a little disappointed with the result 
because I can't scan the sprocket holes with my scanner. 
Some of them blurred, some over-exposured, some shaked
I'm an amateur.  I'll keep learning to be a better holgagrapher.

my CMYK Holga Camera

I miss u

Starbucks

Thumb Up

Mexican Menu

Balinese Dancer

Marching In

Two Bikini Girls

Saxophone Guy

Surf School

Sister & Brother

Sesajen

Sister

Toko Antique

Jl. Kajeng

Big Hole

Blue House

Before Sunset

Trees

Peace

Blue Sky

Surfing Boards

Couples

Multiple Beach

Poppies

TJ's

Flower 

Guest Only

Jump!

Light Leaks

Quirky Sky

Stupid Monkey

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